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Monday, April 30, 2007


BFF or Best Female Friend is what my girls now call their best friends. I try to encourage my girls to cultivate the friends they have now (even though it could sometimes be a chore driving them around and taking them to all their activities) for I know full well how your girlfriends at this stage can become your friends for life.

The ancient photo below (on the right) is of my mom and her friends from work. Coincidentally, some of them had children about the same age as we were, so it was inevitable that we ended up hanging with each other during the numerous get-togethers our mothers attended. For the most part, we are still friends to this day. (see them here, celebrating mom's birthday)

Below is a forwarded email, but the message is worth pondering.

A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day, drinking iced tea and visiting with her Mother. As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter.

"Don't forget your Sisters," she advised, swirling the tea leaves to the bottom of her glass. "They'll be more important as you get older. No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how much you love the children you may have, you are still going to need Sisters. Remember to go places with them now and then; do things with them."

"Remember that 'Sisters' means ALL the women... your girlfriends, your daughters, and all your other women relatives too. "You'll need other women. Women always do."

What a funny piece of advice!' the young woman thought. Haven't I just gotten married? Haven't I just joined the couple-world? I'm now a married woman, for goodness sake! A grownup! Surely my husband and the family we may start will be all I need to make my life worthwhile!'

But she listened to her Mother. She kept contact with her Sisters and made more women friends each year. As the years tumbled by, one after another, she gradually came to understand that her Mom really knew what she was talking about. As time and nature work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman, Sisters are the mainstays of her life.

After more than 50 years of living in this world,
here is what I've learned:
Time passes.
Life happens.
Distance separates.
Children grow up.
Jobs come and go.
Love waxes and wanes.
Men don't do what they're supposed to do.
Hearts break.
Parents die.
Colleagues forget favors.
Careers end.


Sisters are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you. A girl friend is never farther away than needing her can reach.

When you have to walk that lonesome valley and you have to walk it by yourself, the women in your life will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the
valley's end. Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk
beside you...Or come in and carry you out.

Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters, daughters-in-law, sisters, sisters-in-law, Mothers, Grandmothers, aunties, nieces, cousins, and extended family, all bless our life!

The world wouldn't be the same without women, and neither would I. When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we would need each other.

Every day, we need each other still.


Omom said...

That's so laughing looking at the old photo, check out Cynthia by the lamp, no face---just hair. LOL! AND Joy, concentrating on the FOOD!

4malmal said...

I am going to share this letter with all my GF. Thank you!

HiPnCooLMoMMa said...

i tell the same thing to Ish...and i always invite her friends to hang out here in the house...just like you i have to bring them around sometimes...sacrifice it is pero ok lang

exskindiver said...

you are right about good friends lasting for life--if it is cultivated right.
your post reminds me to do better about facilitating play dates for my daughters and their friends. i am the worst about shuttling my kids around.
thanks for the reminder.

JMom said...

hi sis, the photo you posted on your album reminded me of this pic that's why I decided to post it. lol!!

hi 4malmal, I'm glad you liked it.

hi hipncoolmomma, oo nga there are times when we run my hubby out of the house when it gets full of their girlfriends. Sumasakit day yung tenga niya sa mga tili nila. lol!

hi exskindiver, ah the things we do for our kids, right? :) it is really a chore for me to fascilitate these get togethers as I have gotten so lazy in my old age. sad, but true...

Ferdz said...

Nakakatuwa pag hanggang sa katandaan nagkakasama sama pa rin kayong magkakaibigan. It's true that you really have to take care of your friends like a pet. It may be some work but it has rich rewards

Leah said...

ITa always nice to have good and real friends around. And my bestest friends are indeed my sisters. Thanks God I have them.